thank you pinterest :)

Proof that Pinterest is not a complete waste of time.  This neat idea kept my boys occupied long enough for me to clean up the kitchen and check my email in peace...

Add food coloring to shaving cream, give them brushes, and let them at it!

They had a BLAST! And, I think got relatively half-way clean in the process.

1 week to go...

Only 1 week til Christmas...  Been spending  waaay too much time on Facebook and Pinterest - can't seem to focus on anything that requires more brain power :/  Can't concentrate on work or Christmas or keeping the house clean or paying the bills on time.  Too many things running through my mind - the past, the present, the future, good memories, bad memories, what if?, why?, why not?, what the hell?...  So, rather than deal with that I've let myself get sucked into the complete mindlessness of Pinterest (which I highly recommend as an escape by the way).  On the plus side, I've found some really cute craft ideas for the boys.  I have them "pinned" and ready to go for NEXT year when I'm planning on having the energy and the holiday spirit to actually get something done :)

Looking forward to starting over in 2012 - brand new year, brand new life and hopefully a happier one :)

The boys are so excited about Christmas, and I'm determined to make it the best one ever for them :)  I am so proud of how they've adjusted to everything over the past several months, even with their world being turned upside down.  They don't deserve what they've been through, but they are my tough little guys.  They still hurt my feelings and make my cry, but they make me smile and laugh even more...

Merry Christmas from our new and improved family of 3! :)

Not So Peachy...

Even after the boys fell asleep tonight, I stayed in their beds smelling their hair (that I still use baby shampoo on).  It breaks my heart that my only 2 babies belong to someone I no longer have a life with - even though I don't want that life...  Does that make any sense at all??

Rough day, rough night - Tomorrow will be better! :)

Look what my sweet Wyatt made for me today!

Trick or Treat

Halloween 2011

Took the boys trick-or-treating with their cousins.  Think they'd be excited over the candy, right?  Oh no, not our kids... the highlight of their night was getting to press the doorbell which caused a fight at EVERY SINGLE house over whose turn it was to press the doorbell.  Then, there were the houses with just a bowl of candy on the porch.  Of course the boys freaked out thinking they had missed their turn.  And what about the houses where nobody was home?  Does that count as a turn, or do they get to go again?  I'm telling you ABSOLUTE NIGHTMARE.  Next year we will be better prepared with pre-trick-or-treating beverages and a designated adult doorbell ringer... 

food quirks

No surprise that my boys are picky eaters, I have quite a few food quirks of my own.

I don't eat chicken with bones in it - has to be boneless strips.  Totally grosses me out to watch my boys gnawing on a drumstick bone.  I do eat wings, though.  (I know there are bones in there, but they're little).
Steak has to be well done - no pink.
No eggs (except french toast).
I can eat sausage, but don't like it.
No yogurt... It "contains live and active cultures" .  Not sure what that is, but I'm sure as hell not gonna eat it - sounds like a science experiment.
No fish or seafood.

Love salads.
Could probably eat my body weight in french fries.
Not a big dessert person,  would actually rather have fresh fruit.
I only like teeny tiny bites of chocolate (if that's not weird, I don't know what is).

I have to have coffee, lots and lots of coffee, each and every day.
Lots of water and sweet tea.
Coke not Pepsi (and I can tell the difference).
Wine or beer, not too choosy there.
All time favorite drink - gin and tonic with extra lime :)

Cooking 101

Sometimes my kids eat corndogs and pizza.  Ok, most of the time.  I HATE to cook.  If I ever build my house, it quite possibly may not have a kitchen.  Notice I said IF and not WHEN - because this little divorce thing has completely screwed up my plans (but I am sooo not bitter over it) ;)  Anyway, it takes too much time and energy to cook for 3 people when 2 of the 3 will wrinkle their noses and say they want a sandwich.  But, I am really going to try to do better on this.  Because a) At some point, my kids need to eat a healthy meal and b) Sooner or later, my parents are going to stop feeding us.  So, if you have any easy, small portion, easy, kid friendly, easy meal ideas, send them my way.  Did I mention easy? Because that is the key word here :)

NOTE:  If the recipe says "debone chicken", you can just send that on to someone with a stronger stomach than myself.  I'm okay cleaning up puke and snot, and blood does not even phase me; but this girl is not about to "debone" anything...

will you play with me?

I don't know about ya'll, but the smell of play-doh sends me looking for the corkscrew. 
When are you going to play with us?
Just as soon as I get this bottle opened honey...

I love my boys with every tiny piece of my heart, but I cannot stand to play with them.  Horrible, I know, but I think they'll survive childhood relatively unscarred.  I don't mind books or puzzles or legos or coloring, and actually play-doh is one of the lesser evils.  But when they start with "you pretend to be the Hulk and I'll be a T-rex", I have to draw the line.  I cannot "pretend" to be the Hulk.  I cannot make smashing and bashing sounds.  I can't even make good car sounds.  I'm so glad they have super imaginations, I just don't want to be the Hulk, or Ben 10, or Batman, or whatever else has captured their minds at the moment...

But... today is a No School rainy day and I have a sinking feeling I'll cave and be the Hulk by the end of the day.  Because I hate to disappoint them, and I know there will come a day when they're not around to pretend play with anymore.  So probably today about 4 pm (when I switch from coffee to wine), you can find me smashing and bashing with 2 happy boys :)

THAT mom

Sometimes, it's good to be knocked down a notch.  I have become THAT mom.  The one I used to look at and think, "why can't you get your act together?"  The one who forgets to look at the lunch menu and gets her kid to school late.  The one who sends her kid to school with a fever because her thermometer is broken and she can't remember to buy a new one.  The one whose car always needs to be washed.  The one who returns library books late.

Maybe... She never EVER gets enough sleep.  Maybe she needs lots of caffeine and medication to get through the day.  Maybe she's struggling to do everything on her own with 2 small kids.  Maybe she counts down the minutes until her boys are in bed, and she can finally let a few tears fall.  Maybe her kids drive her so completely insane, she can't wait to get away from them.  And then after awhile, she physically hurts being away from them and can't wait to get them back home. 

Maybe she used to always have her life together (at least on the outside), and then her world turned completely upside down.  Maybe her whole world has revolved around being a mommy, and she feels guilty of any "me" time.  Maybe she always knew in the back of her mind there was a reason she never made a wedding scrapbook (not one single photo in the album).  Maybe she got tired of being an average wife when she truly believed she could be a better one with someone else.  Maybe she realized she could be happier alone.  And then maybe she feels selfish for wanting to be happy...

And maybe she finally realized it's okay if you don't always have everything together.  It's okay if your nail polish is chipped and your couch is covered in crumbs (just please dear God, do NOT look under the cushions).  And it's not selfish to be happy and "me" time is important. 

So, the next time you're behind a dirty car with one kid getting out just as the bell rings (possibly without his homework) and another kid in the backseat screaming his head off, just remember it might be THAT mom.  Hell, it might even be me because I am THAT mom, and I'm okay with it.  In fact, I'm Just Peachy :)